The Babylon Bee
DEL RIO, TX—Americans are outraged after whistleblowers produced credible evidence that the U.S. Border Patrol has been patrolling the U.S. border and doing so with impunity for many years.
“How have we allowed our border to be patrolled unchecked for so long?” said AOC on her TikTok channel after viewing harrowing footage of agents on horseback doing their job. “Also, who cut off the horns of those unicorns and put saddles on them? It’s so inhumane! This is actual, literal fascism, people. Just like Hitler and slavery.”
She then donned her fancy white crying suit and wept in anguish.
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